Thursday, May 12, 2011

On being happy more times than not

Before this article gets started, Blogger.com has been down since yesterday morning so my blog for yesterday and today did not go out. Sorry about that, it was out of my control. But here is yesterday's blog now:

People always want to just be Happy.

But we weren't designed to be happy. We were designed to procreate. We are a bag of waters and chemical productions oriented toward making copies of ourselves to progress and stabilize the group.

We have lucked out in a few areas however, in that process. Love, fun, orgasm, pleasures indirectly derived through community, social endeavors, art, music, and the exploration of the senses and their juxtaposition. Lucky in deed.

Dr. John Gottman, University of Washington

An old acquaintance of mine, Dr. John Gottman, at the University of Washington in Seattle, discovered in his work in Martial Research that it takes five positive responses for every one negative response to make up the best formula for a happy relationship. So we really do have to try to be happy more than not, to give more positive vibes than negatives to people in close interpersonal relationships with us. And others, but it's a bit more important to be extra nice to your spouse, your kids, your girlfriend. And maybe that explains why so many have a girlfriend on the side (or a boyfriend).

If we were designed to be happy, wouldn't that be reversed? Or, wouldn't it be heavily weighted toward the happiness emotion? Why is it this way? Maybe it's so we'll try to diversify, over achieve, to never quite be fully happy.

It's something to think about. Don't you think?

If nothing else, I suppose....

Don't Worry. Be Happy!

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