Showing posts with label education. Show all posts
Showing posts with label education. Show all posts

Thursday, July 4, 2024

Walkabout Thoughts #97 Happy Independence Day!

Thoughts in Streams of Consciousness, Rough & Ready, Lightly Edited from an Award-Winning Filmmaker/Author you’ve never heard of while walking off Reality, the last distant vestiges of Long Covid, listening to podcasts...

Walking Day is Wednesday, July 3, 2024.

Weather for the day… nice day, starting out 59°, little wind, overcast, blue sky; 67° back at home.

Podcast is WTF? With Marc Maron Episode 1552 - Paul Scheer

Perfect walking weather. Supposed to get to 75° today 90° by Saturday with a National weather heat alert 5th to the 9th around here.


Happy 4th of July Independence Day!

We've been through a lot these past few years or ten. Hang in there. Hopefully, we'll get back on track and end this roll of criminals and authoritarians and not have to hear their lies about how everyone trying to make everything better, based in reality and America, are the criminals. They're not. So much abuse. Calling career bureaucrats the "Deep State". Just pathetic. 

From yesterday...

Maybe we all should boycott this 4th of July until they give us our country back?

Or maybe we just need a break for a weekend. 

Have fun, be safe! All the best to EVERYONE! 

First a little business and reality...


Well, THAT happened (meme). Kind of like...
"If you'd just lie still while I finish raping you, you wouldn't get hurt! YOU'RE doing this!"
Isn't it?
Nope, not doing this to ourselves.
Know what Project 2025 is yet. 


It's pretty simple.
Reject Donald Trump 
Reject ANYTHING Trump & The STUPIDITY of "Trumpism" 
Reject MAGA 
Reject toxic conservatism 
Reject authoritarianism 
Reject theocracy 
Reject toxic capitalism 
Just be an actual patriot, pro-America, and Americans.


Back to my air conditioner. I do love my air conditioner. And my furnace. And indoor plumbing.

Someone posted online that her most stable relationship has been with her air conditioner. A few years ago, I got rid of mine that saw my kids through much of their childhood. It was old. It was noisy. It ate energy like a hog. This new one is a U-shaped one that fits in one of my old style hung/sash type, up and down windows. I don’t even hear this thing when going off or on and it works great. Low energy, certified, whatever. And works with my Alexa. Which is awesome because I sometimes make it go up and down as the heat and the house changes. It’s weird how in the afternoon, how it can get almost too cool in the house, and then within an hour or two I need the air conditioner on. 

I just remembered this. When we were kids back in the 60s, we had an agreement. See, there were times when we didn't have oil for the furnace to heat the house. We'd huddle in the kitchen around the electric stove for warmth, close the kitchen doors to the living room and front hallway. A few times when we had like, bread, for dinner. But hey, there was butter on it!

Our agreement was that whoever one day made a lot of money, they'd help out the rest of the family. At least close family, nuclear family. Help. Not loans. People always say loans but often that just delays the difficulties. To really change a life, you gift them.

As I understood it, if I made millions of dollars, I'd give each family member a bunch of money. Nothing to harm my continued success, that would potentially harm us all, but enough to change their lives. And so far? No one made it that big and well, time's running out... 

Anyway...

Oh, this was fun. I went to put the rack back in my air fryer because I used it for lunch yesterday and the trays were down drying. I noticed air fryer window needed cleaning. As I was doing that, I ran the underside of my thumbnail into the sharp little widget that connects the door to locks it to the air fryer when you close it. Jammed it right in under my fingernail and hurt like a son of a bitch. Threw some antibiotics on it and was about to head out for my walk. I started to think about how dirty that little thing that stabbed me might be. 

So I actually put a Band-Aid over it. Throughout much of my life I didn’t bother that much with minor wounds. Maybe threw some antibiotic ointment on them, sprayed some Bactine on it when I was a kid, then typically used Neosporin when that came available. And I was good to go. I do that now and it seems to get infected. I do heal fast, but my immune system doesn’t seem to be what it was. Where is that damn pill that makes you 20 again? No, I wouldn’t want to ever be in my 20s again. I wouldn’t mind being 30 for a few hundred years, or for good. Especially the shape I was in when I got out of the service. Able to leap over a 6 foot fence without even trying, or touching it. Ah, the good old days.

Remember in 1980 living at my brother's in his back shed/shop/loft. I was stripped down to nothing in my life. This was before he talked me into going to college. He said about that, "What’s not to love? (Vietnam-era) benefits pay for your school. You get to get an education, you’ll end up making better money, have a better job (he worked construction), there’s parties and college girls all over the place, because… It’s college!"

I decided he was right. Maybe.

I took two weeks to really think it over. Didn't want to make a snap decision and end my unemployed loser lifestyle. Because, while I wanted more education, with great knowledge comes an enhancement to the quality of your human experience. But with that is also an enhancement to one's recognition of all the pain in the world. I took those two weeks very seriously. DID I want to better feel and see so more more of the pain it could bring me?

In the end I decided the good outweighed the bad and I signed up for college for the 3rd time (Once after high school, not sure why I stopped (stupid), once just to get out of the Service 3 months sooner (seemed fun), and this time.

One day I just got tired of just hanging out. Although it was nice after four years of the military to do whatever I wanted. I was on food stamps for a year all together, something I would never have thought of doing before that. But I know now, especially after my psychology degree, I needed a year to decompress. 

I got out of the Service thinking, while this is only the Cold War, a lot of the guys I had been working with had been over in the Vietnam war. They kept telling me that wartime is great, as long as you could avoid being out in the bush. So don’t be in like the canon fodder frontline infantry. But we were USAF. They said parachute rigger was about as safe as you could get. But they had stories about how that could go wrong. Like in someone grabbing you, giving you an M16, sticking you in a foxhole outside the perimeter of the base to stare all night at the tree line off in the distance. Or all the shrapnel holes in the building and ceiling that sucked when it rained. And so on...

In peace time you followed the regs to the point of absurdity. You did your job and only your job and followed the tech manuals. Not really, but mostly. The only power we had over those above us, especially when they were pushing us to hurry up, was to threaten to actually follow the tech manuals word by word. I can’t remember, but I think it was supposed to take 2.5 hours to pack a T-34 emergency high speed deploy parachute, 28' parabolic commando canapy. Can't remember the designation of the harness. The one  we had on the BUFFs (B-52s, Big Ugly Fat Fuckers) and tankers (KC– 135 Strataotankers). Most of us got to where we could pack a chute with all due and required inspection in about 15 to 20 minutes (minus any need to swap out expired parts after 7 years, or damage). I could pack on in I think about 12 minutes and do a decent job.

So if they started giving us crap and we started following the TO (Tech Orders/Technical Orders/manuals), it would take us eight hours to pack 4 chutes instead of 4 hours to pack 8 chutes. I was have jumped any chutes I ever packed. Offered to. But they aid they stopped doing that years before I got there. Why, I asked? My boss said, "Lost too many riggers." And he walked away.

Someone told me and I can’t remember if it was before, during basic training, or after that. if you wanted to make it in the Service, learn the rules. No one did that. None of my friends or coworkers did that. I don't mean out direct regs. But beyond those.

Having had experience as a flight commander when I was in junior high, in Civil Air Patrol, I had to learn all the rules to train others. When you know what all the rules are, it’s amazing what you can do, or get away with. You can walk right up to that rule's end without breaking it because you knew how far you could take it and no one could say anything. Other guys guessed and got in trouble for it. It gives you a lot of freedom.

My fellow Airmen and friends would complain to me that I seemed to get away with murder and, how did I do that? They said, "You’re not one of the “ate up” “ lifers.“ But you seem to go anywhere you want, do whatever you want." Not really, just seemed that tway to them sometimes. "Lifers" were "ate up". They sucked. Mostly because they were aholes and liked to micromanage or play Little King. "Career" types were different and we got along with them. They were in for a career and retirement and in between were pretty normal.

One complaint, the biggest one my friends through at me was that I may have had the longest hair on the base. Aa lot of them had hair shorter than mine and would get $50 tickets for not being within regs. I was downtown with my wife once making a purchase at a department store and showed my military ID. The older gentleman and clerk could not believe I was in the USAF. I was in civvies. When I got home I immediately showed and changed my clothes and washed my hair. I reeked of JP4 jet fuel exhaust from packing BUFF drag chutes, hated that smell. So my hair was lying natural and it's normal length.

My plan on my hair was simple. I had what they called “white walls “. Some of us got them, the ate up types did but were considered lowlife style by many of the guys. I saw service in them, a useful aid. When I got my haircut, I had them shave around my ears, so there was a blank area with no hair, kind of like on a white wall tire. Then I let my hair grow out, but never below the bottom of my hair on my neck which would be within regulation. Then every morning I put Dippity Do in my hair so it would all stay up on top of my head and it would dry the time it took to drive the 15 miles from down downtown Spokane on South Hill and 18th Street. When I got to work I'd park outside the hangers I wear my fatigue cap all day.

So I looked like I had short hair. Some of my friends had hair sticking out of their cap or they would take their caps off and get caught. They would get their $50 ticket from the LE which ironically, was what I went into the Service "guaranteed job" as law enforcement. but got kicked out in Basic because I had flat feet and shouldn’t have even been in the Air Force. Thanks to the AAFES (Army and Air Force Exchange Service)  station doc for that ("keep your socks on if you want to get in") on the day I was inducted.

It didn’t piss them off as much as having to pay for their own haircut after having to pay for a hair-out-of-regs ticket. 

Since I did have flat feet, they had given me a waiver which I’ve gone into elsewhere. That helped me get through basic training but they threw it out in tech school and wouldn’t accept it at my main base at Fairchild Air Force Base outside of Spokane, Washington. a SAC base, Strategic Air Command for the nuclear bombs, bombers, refueling tanker jets, and support services. I was in 92 FMS (Field Maintenance Squadron). The Strategic Air Command (SAC) was deactivated on June 1, 1992 after 46 years of service.

But I did get a kind of sort of waiver. They kicked me out of law enforcement so I couldn’t have a job sitting in a squad car all day whereas it was the SPs, the security police guarded the planes who DID stand around all day. I think they just thought law enforcement, security police, same thing, lower body has to have this certain rating. Which I didn’t have having had it lowered in basic.

So I chose as a replacement flight simulator technician to train pilots, which would’ve been awesome. But somebody got it just before me and I just missed getting it. My back up job was parachute rigger because I’d been skydiving a couple of years before as detailed in my screenplay “The Teenage Bodyguard “.



Starting my 2nd mile…

So anyway, they gave me a kind of minor waiver at my main base because I had the flattest feet my foot surgeon ever saw when he performed surgery on my left arch when I was in 10th grade.

But a Parachute rigger has to walk up and down a concrete floor next to a 40 foot parachute packing table all day long, every day, for years. Sucked. We had a rubber pad to stand on at the end for most of our work, which was something.

That wasn’t the worst because then they told me I had to pack B-52 drag chutes which were 48-foot split ribbon, yellow nylon, and when fluffy and dried had one hell of an electric shock. To the point that it hurt and it happened many times every time you packed one like that. I remember getting zapped and shaking my hand in pain and swearing. Trying to avoid it but you could hear the static electricity as you were moving the split ribbon around to stage it to go into its containment bag, then ZAPP! DAMNIT that HURT! lol Not that it hurt THAT bad, but when it happens again and again and then you need to pack another, and another, it gets old pretty damn quickly.

They were mostly pretty good and not shocking if they were delivered off the flight line after deployment, dry. When they were wet however they were heaven in a lump dropped outside the shop. You had to drag them in the door, down the packing room, around the packing table, into the parachute shop, to the drying tower, hook the top of the canopy to the big hook on a cable, and use the scary giant hand-held drill to turn the winch to pull them up to the top at their full length to dry them.

IF you weren't careful with that drill, it would throw you across the room. I was told a guy before I got to the base, who left before I got there, actually got his arm broken by the drill. Wasn't paying close enough attention. You PAID attention. I just tried to find a photo of a drill that big, couldn't. You had trouble picking it up it was so big. Once you got it on the winch the weight wasn't the issue, the power was.


When on the next day, you pulled them out of the drying tower, they were just a fluffy bundle of electricity waiting to spark which weirded me out at first. I know you can rub your feet no a nylon carpet and zap somebody or get zapped touching a doorknob, happened to me all the time as a kid with our rug at home. This was another universe of zapping.

When they first showed me a drag chute packing can, where you would put the containment bag in the can to maintain form, fold the chute down into it off the packing table, where you had ordered it up and tied string to keep the ribbons from tangling from the 28lb buckle that attached to the B-52, to the canopy rim...it would stick up a foot or two of just pure nylon on top of nylon ribbon, sticking out of the top of the bag.



Then you would get on top of that bucket and hold a bar above your head, and literally jump up and down on it until it was low enough that you could seal the bag. That photo above is from a series of photos showing the process which cracks me up because there are two of them packing that drag chute. I never had anyone helping.

My worst day was packing FOURTEEN in a single day, can't remember if any were wet which was just an added nightmare. I was so exhausted by end of day. It was during an "exercise". An "alert", when we played war to practice or be tested and rated and it was miserable. Usually, I'd pack 3 or 4 drag chutes a day in the morning first thing to knock them out, then go pack emergency cutes the rest of the day. 

A day full of drag chutes, knowing it was all week long? Suuucked.

The first time they showed me that bucket I laughed. Kinda like when they told me as the new guy, I was to always sweep the entire shop before I could go home at night. My question? You guys don’t have people who come in and sweep up and clean the place? Their answer: Yeah. You.

Me: So, THIS is how you get a drag chute into the bag? You don’t have a machine to push it down in there? Wait. That’s me, right? Never mind.

And the Sergeant would just laugh and walk out back to his office with his coffee and cigarette. Miss ya, Pete.

Jumping up and down on that drag chute was so much worse than just walking up and down a concrete floor all day. Especially every once in a while, when you'd be jumping and kicking that drag chute down into that bag and you'd get to do it fast in a rhythm until one time you get a little off-kilter and jam the middle of your foot down on that thin steel side of the container which did NOT BEND. I thought I broke my foot a couple time and it took 20 minutes or so before I could continue.

And nowadays I have a lot of trouble with my knees and that left ankle where I had the surgery. Which is typically the foot that would get jammed packing drag chutes for some reason I remember the second time it happened during the same packing session, why did it have to be the LEFT foot AGAIN? Anyway, cause and effect? Are my joint problems now from that? Maybe. VA doesn't think so. As with breathing in JP4 jet fuel exhaust off the drag chutes, in a closed room, flapping the panels on the chute to order them up for clean and very rapid deployment, hour after hour, for years. 

How could that cause any later issues? Right?

But good times, right? It was better than during war getting shot,  killed or maimed. Cannon fodder. Pete loved to remind us of that. Every single day. 

Getting back to the older guys I worked with who had been in Vietnam when I got there, it was early '76 and Vietnam just ended. During peacetime, you had to follow all the regs. During wartime, they told stories of being a parachute rigger at some base in Vietnam. You’re walking down the flight line and some crew chief maybe up on a wing of a jet is working on something and he says, Hey come over here. 

Maybe he has you help change some oil our or whatever he’s working on that you are not trained to do. You would end up doing a lot of different jobs. You helped where you were needed. Stuff you were not trained or allowed to do but it was war and regs were looser and so war was great. At least, a better time for those not on the front line.

Our sergeant and second in command of our shops told a story once where a general was visiting all the bases. They had this asshole commander they hated who wanted everything by the book and one day the commander was complaining to the general about how the troops wouldn’t fall in line. Short story shorter, the general relieved him of command. Because everyone was under a lot of stress and had to get work done and they worked just fine when they weren’t being micromanaged. Everyone loved the general.

So that was my life as the shop “jeep“ until about 18 months later when we got some new people and eventually I became the parachute shop supervisor, as a senior airman,h three stripes and an invisible blue star. They had recently changed that back then. You previously would get sergeant stripes before initial enlistment was up, if you’re only doing 4 to 6 years. 

So I separated service  as senior airman. While I was in college after that, during my two years of post-active service during my final 2 years of inactive service, which I was sweating out because they could call me back into service at any time, I got notified by mail that I had somehow made Staff Sergeant. Must’ve missed when I became an actual "buck" sergeant (with a visible white start with the three stripes).

So for the rest of my life for all intents and purposes, I made staff sergeant in the US Air Force. Even though I never ever saw Sergeant rank before I got out off active duty.

I also had Vietnam benefits. And until around the time I was either in college or sometime in the 80s, one day they just said you’re now post-Vietnam era. I don’t get how they do that. If you sign up and your Vietnam era, how do they just later a decade or two on, decide to change that? To be fair when I signed up and they said you just got in before the end as Vietnam Era, that's good for you. I complained But they said that's how it works. You made it. But I never made it to Vietnam. 

Well whatever. I still did get my Vietnam era benefits, at least so far as college. I mean my university fees were $350 a quarter with $100+ for books which always hurt and I had to scrape up somewhere. But I had enough because school only ate up one of my benefit checks, which were around $350 a month. But then for the other 2/4 of that session of school, I would have full benefit checks to live on and pay rent with. 

I lived with my girlfriend so she kicked in half, usually as she could. Money was tight. She got a job as a vet tech at a veterinary clinic, which she had been doing when I first met her and since she was in high school. I could have gotten a job but honestly I was worried about school as I was studying all the time. She went through Catholic prep school and was very smart. Though she was studying all the time right there with me. I'm really not sure either of us could have made it through school without the other though to be honest. We made an amazing team in school and were pretty well known on campus. But not for going to a lot of parties, to be sure.

I had met her when I got out of the Service. I took a quarter Tacoma Community College which got me out of the Service three months early. Along with having so much paid leave saved up, I took 60 of my 90 days of saved leave and got out an extra two months early meaning that my shop chief knew I was getting out in six or seven months but suddenly I was getting out in two. 

I was on top of the world about that because once you become a two-digit midget, that is only have 99 days left in Service, not three digits as in over 100, everybody tended to get excited. It was a pretty big deal in general. You'd say "Well as of today I'm a two digit midget." And people would grown for their own time left in.

Either that or you re-upped and hopefully got a bonus and that was all there was to be excited about, unless maybe getting a reassignment or a new job or whatever.

I considered staying in, but in my job they were offering $10,000 and even the Squadron 1st Sergeant was bummed that's all it was. I did go through the process to join the OSI the Office of Special Investigations, the USAF's FBI. I would actually sit in their office waiting room reading FBI Magazine while waiting to see the CO. Which up tol that point in 1979, I hadn't even known that mag existed.

Yes, there at least once was an FBI Magazine.

But that’s all another story that I’ve told several times elsewhere. Assigned to Berlin probably ending up running into Vladimir Putin when he was there as a KGB agent, I would be replacing an OSI agent who was blown up by the KGB getting into his car one day, according to the CO. So I would take that job which was sitting fallow for a year because no one wanted to get blown up. I jumped on it.

But after getting accepted, I got out and went to college. Decided I couldn't do that to my wife (then ended up getting divorced anyway). After I got out I tried to get a job. But that failed miserably. After a while of doing nothing, my older brother talked me into college and that changed everything.

On education nowadays, I grew up thinking everybody needed to go to college. We’ve grown into a high-tech world and we need a lot of college educated. People around the world try to come here for college, but we don’t give them incentive to stay. So they take that knowledge back to enhance their own country.

That’s nothing bad about them. Good for them. Bad for us because we should be thinking and acting better. If we’re gonna train the world, it’s the same thing in the 1800s when we decided to give K-12 free to everyone. One of the best things America ever did.

“A rising tide lifts all boats.“ JFK

Exactly. So we either need to give students a reason to keep their degrees, and advanced degrees, in America and for our benefit, maybe for a certain time before they can go home or everyone who's an American citizen should go to college. Hang on...

We need blue collar too. We have long now given away K-12 free, paid for through our taxes, which there may be a wiser way or an adjunct to that. If Republicans would stop trying to cripple our education system… look how well that worked out for them with charter schools and home-schooling their kids indoctrinating them into MAGA bullshit and Christian nationalism… and no, a lot of people homeschool and they’re just normal Americans, not right-wing extremists.

I know (ex)wife homeschooled our youngest for their first year and decided to put them into school that next year where they were tested and could’ve gone into fourth grade instead of second. I had emotional concerns for them in that so I said let’s skip just one year and my wife agreed. But that was still difficult on them once they hit high school. Especially when all their friends were getting driver's licenses and they still had a year ago. That almost killed them. I felt bad but reminded them that we could have let them skip more years and things would be even worse. 

I used to think about that because I skipped a year my first year and never could figure out why things seemed out of whack for the next 12 years. But in the end, it was fine. I think. Maybe. Maybe not?

Anyway, I’ve spoken about this education thing a bunch of times. Were we gave everyone K-12 and now let’s face it, things have changed. We should be giving everyone K-14 but now the cost of colleges and universities is ridiculous. That needs to be gotten under control.

But offering 14 not just 12 years means everybody can get a community college degree at the very least. If you are wealthy, then pay for it yourself, have some patriotism. Have some empathy and compassion for those who have so much less than you do. And that would also cover two years of Voc tech school. So you don't want to go to college you can learn a skill or trade and get certified.

That would vastly change a lot of the problems we have today. But no, God forbid conservatives and Republicans do anything to either help anyone else, or help America, or understand that whole adage, that…

A rising tide lifts all boats...

When will conservatives/Republicans understand all they do doesn't have to just profit them. Do your job, which isn't just to retain your job. Wait, narcissism. Now I see their attraction to Trump.

Starting my 3rd mile…

Why do I do that? Mention what mile I’m on because maybe, especially if I’m walking a long distance day, gives you an idea that maybe the last things he said after that last mile...is  he dying or maybe not thinking clearly or... thinking more clearly now?

Also at the bottom of this track I walk in my 1st mile when starting off it says one in this transcription. When I roundabout at the end of the two lengths and start the 2nd mile, I put down two. So I indicated in two places in this document. 

Here is the reason why really. Just now I went to put down mile two. But I saw a two already there. So I put down mile three. Realizing that this is my last mile. Sometimes I get into this Jawin’, talking, speeching, recording thing and I forget where I’m at. Some of that is maybe getting older. Some of that is ADHD since I’ve been going through that all my life and always keep notes.

In 10th grade, I told my sister, three years older than me who had just graduated, so after third grade we were never in the same school again, I said I can’t keep track of things. I keep forgetting things. She said just use your watch on your wrist. I said I do, but it doesn’t help... a little bit maybe.

So she said OK do what I have done. When you think of something throughout the day that you don’t want to forget. Like, after school I have to remember to do this or that. Write it on a piece of paper and put that in your pocket where you keep your house key. When you start driving, it’ll be even more obvious because you need to get your car key out to drive home from school. Just try to remember at the end of every day before you leave school check your pocket. I started doing that and at end of day one day I pulled out my keys and there were all these pieces of paper with notes on them. 

What I learned about this, years later, was I have to trick my mind into doing what I want it to do. I told my kids about this. My oldest son as usual back then as a teen, rebelled against the concept.

Recently, he was telling me how he had a thing that he would do that worked for him, and he always remembered whatever it was. I reminded him about what I had told him when he was younger. I said, so you get it at age 35. That’s what I was trying to tell you as a kid. You just have to figure out your own method, but it’s basically the same thing. 

He objected apparently as we figured out then in talking about it, to "tricking" his own mind. I didn't care for me, as long as it worked. Just how I saw it when I was younger.

It’s also like when you set yourself up for a reward and you get it after you do what you want to do. That works really really well.

I told him when he was younger, and he rediscovered it on YouTube, about the delayed gratification test. He mentions that a lot now. In the test you take several children separately and offer them one (in this original case) marshmallow. Tell them if they wait they get another marshmallow. Leave them in a room alone for a short time. 

Certain personality types have to eat that marshmallow right then. Others wait and get rewarded with a second. And those I think the contention is, do better in life, espcecially in business. It also makes for a good metaphor in life.

I was thinking yesterday that recording this blog as I walk is fine and cathartic. It helps me work out issues in projects I work on and even future projects and consider things from my history and life experiences.

And hopefully, I offer something to anyone who reads this. That’s two things I wanted to address. If it seems I’m bragging or trying to show myself in a good light or something. I’m not. I’m trying to share things that might benefit others.

Oh, he did that? I could do that!
Oh, he has trouble with that? I have trouble with that. That’s an interesting way to think about it or deal with it. Or I'll do the oppsite.
Oh, what an idiot this guy is. I can do way better.

Cool. Whatever. I don’t care. Think I’m a lowlife? OK. Just remember if anything good comes of anything you read here, even if it’s the opposite of what I’m saying, then reading this was helpful.

OK, the other thing was I’m doing this walk every day now and basically doing a blog every day. Recording is fun and easy. Doing the read through and edit to get it online... admittedly it’s interesting and sometimes I’ll take notes and save them somewhere else, but it’s also laborious. On the other hand, it’s helping me get back into editing an entire book. Which as some of you may know I need to finish my film companion book on my documentary. Worked on that I think till the end of December or so.

I was thinking maybe I should walk every other day because it gives all of us a break and then I can lift some weights because I really need to do some strength training. All my life I did that at home or at the gym. One day aerobics, the next day, strength training, lifting weights.

In the Service, the boss told us one day as we were headed to lunch, you know you can go to the gym and get an extra half hour off at lunch giving you 90 minutes. My friend Craig and I looked at him and said, What!

So we got the equipment and started playing racquetball every day. At some point, we thought we should be lifting weights so we started playing racquetball one day and strength training the next. In our job, you needed strength training. You were a lot less tired at night.

So there it is…

Man, I’m not giving Marc’s blog any leeway on his blog today… Bad me.

About 37 minutes into the podcast, Marc’s guest tells in incredible story about being in LA and a company you could pay to give you call out sheets of where all the productions were outside. So he got to go at 11 with his dad and met Michael Landon on set of I some show. And David Carradine, who gave him an autograph with a yin yang symbol. 

Then he and his dad go to where a movie "Communion" was being filmed. He has an incredible story about Christopher Walken talking to him, just the two of them. Kind of an amazing damn story, especially for an 11-year-old. Definitely worth listening to, just open the podcast and go to maybe minute 35 when he starts talking about this… Wow.

Then Marc starts talking about when he was living in Albuquerque, Sam Peckinpah was shooting his last movie, Convoy. Which for Sam wasn't his best film. But he got to meet a bunch of stars in the film that day.

I remember when Convoy came out. That was a really big movie for what seemed like a kind of “B” flick.

They’re talking about how cool it used to be to do that kind of thing and just walk on a set and how opening and friendly everybody was. But you know, somebody’s always gonna ruin it so we had stockers and paparazzi and whatever so they've locked things down. He said the security guards on sets were really nice.

Which of course, reminds me of my own story about being on the set of the pilot of Starman TV show at the Seattle Center at the monorail after having been on their set up near my apartment on Queen Anne Hill. They were at that  famous location that everybody wants to shoot from for commercials and movies and TV that overlooks the city and the space needle. I was just driving home from work at Tower Video on Mercer Street by the Seattle Center and there's suddenly an entire film production on the street before me. I stopped and got out. What the hell? Cool.

That night by the base of the Space Needle the location manager noticed me sitting there watching the action and all the extras wandering around around midnight. He set me right next to the camera and the Director, right in the action. I had told him I was an aspiring screenwriter and had never been on a film set. Which isn’t quite true, but not that kind of set.
 

I’ve been on our local kids show in the late 1960s,  The Brakeman Bill Show (I liked the JP Patches Show better but I did watch his show too). I was doing karate demonstrations with our Sensei and a couple other students. Did that a few times on the show. 



But does that really count? Tiny TV studio set, not an actual on location (TV) film set. It ruined my childhood on Brakeman Bill's because they had a hand puppet called "Crazy Donkey" who everybody liked because he was irascible and funny. And suddenly I’m on this tiny set having thought it was somehow bigger and some guy's got his arm shoved up the backside of Crazy Donkey and I’m trying to give a karate demonstration and not look over at him.

On that note, I’ll bid you adieu...and leave you with that. 
It’s nowhere near noon time and lunch.

Cheers! Sláinte!

Monday, July 13, 2020

Education and Sorrow

When I graduated high school, I swore off school. But not education. I continued on my own, as I'd always been a voracious reader. I was "grounded" to my room a lot as a kid and books saved me. Locked in my room, I was out in the universe having adventures, or learning occult knowledge. Things unknown to my contemporaries and my family.

My K-12 years were a misery, getting easier toward the end in high school, even though I worked nights since tenth grade. My ADD certainly made my first nine years of school difficult. Though, in my own way, at my own pace, I could excel. That seldom was allowed to happen. Not unusual for any child, to be sure.

But that had little to do with how our national cookie-cutter, 19th century industrial age school system worked. One that we mostly still have today.

"Assembly line them out to get factory jobs!" Time and resources and not enough teachers meant you do it how you are asked, or you walk. More accurately? You're tossed out. I'm sure ethnic minorities had it worse. I was lucky. I was white, lower middle class. But the lower your economic class was, the worse you had it. Ethnic distinctions or not.

I never knew there was a method. Not until I took "Study Skills" in college. Then things got a bit easier. I saw it listed and thought what a great idea! Why did n't they teach us this in K-12? Apparently, you're just supposed to learn it through osmosis. Well? Some of us didn't. Couldn't.

After the Air Force at twenty-five, I floundered for a while. Until I sunk into being nothing. Though I started to acquire a greater love of life. Shrooms, weed, and LSD aided that sojourn.

One day my older brother talked to me in his backyard, where I was living for a year in his outbuilding, in a loft I had refurbished. I was a minimalist then, but it was a freeing, enjoyable experience. Knowing all the while that I was not living to my potential and had effectively lost all I had gained while in the Service. At least materially. Well, I lost a marriage too. But that was on me, in marrying too young.

My brother convinced me to use my VA benefits. And so I started college. For the fourth time. Though this time being my only real effort toward a degree.

“Sorrow is knowledge: they who know the most must mourn the deepest o’er the fatal truth, the Tree of Knowledge is not that of Life.” Lord Byron

But before I made my decision to start college and get an actual degree of some kind, I decided to take two weeks to ruminate and consider my situation, and my future.

I felt life had been somewhat painful up to that point. Though, I was making the best of it. At least, emotionally. Which was overshadowing my existence at the time. I had trouble finding a job after years in the military where I had great respect and responsibility. People's lives actually depended on me.

Now? No one seemed to want to trust me at all. Other than a few shady jobs I'd had. More than one of which had taken great advantage of me.

Over those two weeks, I considered what a degree, what higher education would offer me. More knowledge? Sure. A sharper mind. Hopefully. A greater understanding of both the world around me and the universe? To be sure.

I was quite aware of how, with greater knowledge, comes greater pain. I was very focused on that for that first week or so, not much interested in renewing my experience of being abused by a school system once again. But there was something I did not know yet about the difference between college and K-12.

During that second week, however, I started to consider how, with greater knowledge, also comes a greater appreciation of things. A better understanding of art, cinema, science, people, and living in general. There was an upside to it.

In the end, I decided I would give education one last try. After all, if I could survive the nonsense the military put me through, I could certainly deal with school of my peers. Though I would be older now, and returning to school after time away. I would have to get back to where I had been nine years ago when I graduated at seventeen. And that was a little unnerving.

Still, there would surely be wine, women, and song. This was not K-12, but an assemblage of adults. Or near adults anyway.

Once I got into college, took the study skills class along with my other first-quarter classes that first year. I settled in. People, other students this time, were different. People were there because... for a change, they actually wanted to be there. They paid to be there. Not like before where most of us wanted to be elsewhere and were working out issues about authority and our parents. Though, to bs sure some still were. But my K-12 years? Or parents did that to us. The government did that to us.

As one prof put it, he loved teaching college because the kids actually wanted to be there. They had made a choice. Most of them, A choice to be there. They wanted to learn.

And that was what I saw in my fellow classmates. It was addictive and invigorating. A bit shocking at first. Others in my classes would join in. It wasn't just the smart girl, speaking up, or the wise-ass clever guy joining in, all as the rest of us just sat there ignorant or annoyed. Or worse, bored.

People joined in the discussions. The learning invoked great attitudes and we all wanted to be there. I too wanted to be there. It was kind of amazing and rewarding, and after a quarter or two of classes, I was fully invested. The more I learned, the more I wanted to learn more. But also, the more I learned, the less I knew I knew of the ever-expanding awareness of the vastness of all knowledge. 

This was better than partying all the time or doing drugs. It was also giving me something back for my efforts. Something that would remain with me for the rest of my life.

However, there was indeed a downside. 

Deep into the last part of the Fall quarter in my final year, I wandered into the Career Center at Western Washington University. I thought, maybe they could offer me some help, as soon, I would graduate. And...then what?

I sat with a counselor and explained my situation. She looked at me shocked and said, "You're late." I asked what she meant. I had months until I graduated. I believe, about three left. "See these other students in here?" She said. I looked around. A few students were studiously reading various things and filling out forms. "Yes?" What she said next disturbed and shocked me.

"They've been coming here for months, some for a year already. You should have been here sooner."

And sure enough, she was right. I never did find a job for after graduation. I graduated and moved back home, to Tacoma. And... ended up at the same job I had when I started college, and at the same hourly rate. I was crushed. Happy to have a job. But despondent. 

It was a letdown to be sure. Why didn't ANYONE tell me to prepare for leaving college? Eventually, I transferred up to Seattle to another store with the same company, MTS Incorporated. Tower Records. It was a fun place to work, not much money, and not the potential for advancement.

IF you weren't interested in getting your own store to manage. Which I wasn't. Reason there being, I'd been in retail sales since tenth grade at the Drive-In Theater where I worked nights all through high school. I'd started there cleaning the field the night after shows played. It was back-breaking work for a ninth-grader.

Someone once told me that to make money in life, you can't be the employee who physically touches any of the money made. You have to get away from that. Which surely managing the store would do. But I wanted more, yet.

I tried to get a job in Seattle as a starting psychologist and got hit with the hard reality that I was already getting paid more where I was. I was stunned. It wasn't much more but after money, time, blood, sweat, and tears to get a university degree, I'd make the same money? 

I had found before graduating at the career center at WWU that many students were already volunteering for unpaid jobs. Then later after graduation, many got hired. I couldn't afford to do that any longer now that I was working for a living. I'd blown that opportunity.

When I found that out while still in college, I asked a friend and fellow psych student about that and she said, oh yeah, sure. I've been volunteering with special needs kids for a while now. Years later she was a counselor at a K-12 school. 

And so, I found myself stuck in my job for a while longer.

Eventually, I was able to find my first computer job which began my life in IT work. Which eventually paid very well as I worked my way up. I shocked coworkers on my IT team, all of who had computer science degrees. While I had a degree in psychology. 

Regarding that. You'd be surprised how many skills are similar between understanding people as a psychologist and debugging computers, systems, networks, and programs. I did quite well at it.

But I've gotten off track here.

My original point remains. With greater knowledge comes greater awareness...and greater responsibility.

The same is true in the opposite direction for those who remain uneducated and bluster their way through, wanting to be treated as if they deserve the respect some of us have put so much time and effort into achieving. 

Then they start to talk authoritatively about sophisticated issues. Like medicine, or sociological issues. Or politics. Some to be sure are self-educated and deserve our respect. But they are the few.

Certainly, few, who can do it properly. Which is why higher education and structured learning was developed in the first place. Without it, it's too easier to miss entire areas of relevancy.

Too many think they can and have achieved that proper coverage of knowledge on their own, and surely, as most of us have seen...that is simply not the case. And we all have to suffer them and their ignorance as wisdom. There's one at least on every job in every career who thinks they know more than they do. It is a costly thing for them to be employed, until they are found out, and removed. 

In ending, I'll just say this.

More education is almost always better than less. To assume the opposite is dangerous... and abusive. Abusive to the country, to our fellow citizens and to ourselves, our family, friends, and our loved ones.

Whenever you are faced with a problem, an issue, a concern? Take the time to learn more about it. But also and just as importantly, about the surrounding issues. Even some that seem completely unrelated. Because too often, they are related in unseen, and unforeseen ways. 

Because everything is connected and should be seen that way.

Otherwise one day you find yourself poor in so many ways. You find an unnecessary global pandemic staring you down as you die and you wonder... "How did this happen?"

How? It is because with great knowledge comes greater responsibility and greater sorrow. And if you allow it, greater joy too.

But if you don't handle it properly, you will suffer. And others will suffer. We, will suffer. And we do not appreciate it. Especially if WE did do the work.
  
Just as we're all seeing happen today. All around us. All the internet armchair quarterbacks. Political pundits, not worth their weight in...swamp mud. 

Yet, it does not have to be like this. We CAN handle things right. To see our responsibilities. To act to address them properly. To find our job in life that will give you the best life. 

It doesn't have to be this way. We can do better. It just takes effort. It just doesn't have to be like this. 

It really doesn't. 

Monday, May 18, 2020

"I'm Smarter Than The Experts!" Really?

Regarding this current issue of Americans thinking: "I'm smarter than the experts"...(check out the article, it's pretty interesting and enlightening).

First of all, allow me this. For the record? I do NOT think I'm smarter than experts. Question, but verify. Not disagree and denigrate.

I grew up thinking I was stupid. My step-father didn't much like me. ADD helped with that belief in just making life more difficult. I read a lot in getting "grounded" at home a lot and so I actually knew a lot. When I shared those things, most others had no clue what I was talking about and so to them, and they weren't reticent in sharing it with me, they just assumed I must be... if not just weird, then stupid. 

I've written about all this before. I've shared my past like this from time to time for the most part, for those others who are going through the same kind of thing. All in an attempt to give them hope. I never thought I'd amount to much of anything or make a decent living and I've done quite well. I'm not rich. But I'm not poor either and I have worked with some brilliant minds in IT and in general. I've met very interesting people. I've raised two amazing kids to adulthood. I've had a very interesting life. How could I ask for more? So yea, there is hope. Always. 

For those considering suicide? Remember this. You can always just walk away from your life and let that be your suicide. But you'll always be there you go to. So seek help. Help yourself. Never day die. Never give up. I know, superficial view of depression and suicide. Some cannot be helped and will die. Others however, can be, and will survive, if they just keep these things in mind.

It wasn't until my third year of university in working closely with my psychology department professors, with my primary department advisor, Dr. Rees, that I was convinced I was not stupid, but quite the opposite. It's hard to counter a lifetime of belief, proven in poor k-12 grades and life being more difficult than others around you. 

But I was getting a degree in psychology. And these guys were the experts.

I learned three very important things, evolved through three very necessary stages in my college career.

The first was that I learned in college was, "Damn this is hard, but kind of fun in a painful sort of way." I could "feel" my brain (mind) at times, literally (seemingly) stretching. It was hard to find time to assimilate it all att as the pace in college is fast, at university it's light speed. In case you do not know already, colleges have masters level professors, while universities have doctorate level professors.

The second thing I learned and evolved through in college was, "Damn, I know a LOT now and I'm learning more all the time!" But I kept that quiet until my third year, at university. I got a two year degree, then transferred to Western Washington University, in beautiful Bellingham, Washington.

However, once my university professors saw that kind of behavior in me, which they were quite used to from undergrads I'm sure, they smooshed it right down and put me in my place. Usually, it just took talking to them at THEIR LEVEL, not MINE, and in doing so, realizing that compared to them, damn, was I ignorant! 

Two year colleges tend to do their best to build you up, to be able to handle being at a four or more year university. While universities realize they have to continue to build you up, but also keep you in your place to be as rational and realistic as possible. Although, some colleges one wonders about that latter part, such as with the "Ivy League" schools. It's easy to become full of oneself. 

One has achieved a lot by graduation. so enjoy it. But at tomse point, and as soon as possible, do come back down to earth. Yes?

Ever hear someone say, "I wish I was as smart as I thought I was at 16?" There is a reason for that.

Thus the third and most important thing I learned and evolved through at university. Something most armchair quarterbacks or those who just think they are smarter than the experts, may never have the opportunity to achieve as they do not have a structured course, or professors watching out for them. That being that the more I learned, the more I realized the less I knew that I knew. The semi educated know they know more than they knew, that they may know ore than many others in their group, or bubble. 

However, if you do not ever realize as you gain knowledge that the more you know, the less you know in the ever expanding envelope of the greater knowledge of he universe, then you are setting yourself up, and others around you, for a good deal of misery. 

Or appearing vapid and ignorant to those who truly are more aware of the all the universe has to offer one, overall. That is part and parcel of what we are seeing now in so many who think the Internet, is in some way an education. It is not. It's is an increasing of awareness, without form or structure in education.

My appraisal at that time at university was that for every single thing I learned, there were four or more things I didn't know. I felt I was becoming dumber and dumber, not smarter and not necessarily wiser. And indeed in the face of all experience and knowledge, so it is. Past experience, incorporated with current knowledge, can offer one some form of wisdom. But it is not the same as achieving knowledge and then applying it to current experience.

Along with that, however (luckily) went the appropriate feeling of my being humble, and in working with my professors, of being humbled again and again, before their vast knowledge and that of the universe at large. And of those others who were true experts. Those I should show respect to, 

All of who are what Kate Bush is referring to in her song, "Them Heavy People." Oh, don't know who Kate Bush is? You've missed the amazing and genius then, but...her videos and documentaries are still available. 

Those who were not only more knowledgeable, but more importantly, wiser, and that is very important, do deserve our respect and at times, our great respect. Knowledge and experience can become wisdom. CAN...become. Too often, they are not. Thus the importance of higher education in a structured form and Socratic and didactic methods with those far wiser than you.

Earth may now have the most knowledgeable people in human history, but we do not have the wisest people to be sure. And that is part of the great problem we are now faced with.

“There is a cult of ignorance in the United States, and there has always been. The strain of anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.”

After I graduated university and went through the omnipresent and rather annoying graduate's period of "I know everything, let me share!" ....something not everyone "graduates" through and so remain an asshole the rest of their lives...I began to see in others less educated, a disrespect toward the educated and those far more knowledgeable. Even those far more educated than I would ever be.

And that truly puzzled me.

People I would feel honored to meet, to be among those types so much greater than myself in wisdom, while far too many seemed to feel bitterness or even anger toward them. Weird. Truly, really weird. Because being in their presence for a time can enhance who you are as a person and can alter your life going forward, making it easier, better, with more quality or even wealth. Which really in this context is the least of considerations. 

But surely, not to detract from it. I also always felt honored to share what I knew with others, and this is where some get caught up in thinking sharing, is about ego and it's not, and it shouldn't be. But a gift. Yet I was outwardly perplexed at how few were interested. Interesting in learning, in replacing lesser ideas with greater and more accurate ones. And for free. Without all the suffering and pain and effort I had to put into it all to finally achieve.

Seeing those wiser than oneself in a negative light merely puts one's own ignorance and ego on display for all those more knowledgeable than you. It can be seen like a beacon. When instead in seeking knowledge and sharing it, should make one appear brilliant both to oneself and to those less educated.

We have fallen down on this as a nation and a species. The Chinese in their "Cultural Revolution" for the People, actually murdered their elite thinkers, but luckily for them, only imprisoned some for many years. Some eventually brought back out when their communist nation remained their massive mistake. 

 All for feeling these educated people, doctors, scientists, historians, philosophers, were "elitist" (as opposed to being "elite" and an entirely different thing altogether), and not party of the common People. All which put China back by at least 50 years at the time. 

Just as America, in a way, in our own way, are doing to ourselves today. 

I suppose that is some of what annoys so many here and today. To feel looked down upon by those who consider themselves elitists. But too often that is a poor self esteem issue in oneself and hast utterly nothing to do with our elites whom we desperately need. IF you feel belittled in being ignorant, something I've always deemed as noble, everyone is after all, ignorant of something... then use the great inoculation against ignorance. Education. It's expensive? And why do you think that is the case? The ignorant are more easily manipulated and governed. 

Which America political party seems more against education, finding and supplying money to those institutions? Well, to be sure it is a complex subject. I did go to college in hope of better job prospects.

My older brother, after I got out of the USAF and had Vietnam Era VA benefits, seeing how down and out I was (I had lost my marriage, job, could not find a good job and that's why I went in part, into the Air Force, and I was floundering and on food stamps), tried to talk  me into college. He convinced me to think about it. 

When I graduated High School, K-12 as such a miserable academic experience, I swore to never go to school again. I took two weeks to think about it. I realized as much as I felt life, as much as it hurt emotionally at times, were I to become educated, I would find life even more in depth, I would understand everything better. I would feel greater pain in life. 

But I realized in the pro side of the pro/con list, I would also appreciate lief more, the quality of my life would be better. I would look at a picture, or film, or piece of music and have a greater appreciation of it. Or for human interaction. Or it would hurt more. 

In the end I decided the pros outweighed the cons and I started college. Never planing on more than a two year AA degree. But my girlfriend wanted a university degree. So I followed her. That was the catalyst. 

But then I was fully invested. My first college class toward an AA was Study Skills. I learned there is a way to learn in school. No one ever told me about that and so I suffered through K-12. None of us are taught that. But most of us make it through our "cookie cutter" 18th century style school systems Which has been changing to some degree of late. Having ADD just made it more difficult and yet, someone I graduated 12th grade. 

So in the end, I got a university degree. Something I'd never have though possible. Yet I did it. And others can do it. No, of course everyone doesn't need a college or university degree. Vocational schools are great things. It's really about what will make you happier, more fulfilled in life. It's not all about money! But we do have to make a living. We have to survive. But we don't have to be miserable all our lives, either. Sometimes only a little educate is all we need. For some of us we gleam that from living from day to day. But not all of us.

The important things is, remember that those who truly know more than us, should be listened to. Peer review is important. Picking out one "expert" because he agrees with you is foolish. Also ignoring the outlier can also be foolish. Confusing? Yes.

But that is why we need to educate and lean into knowledge, but ever more so...wisdom.

Yes there are indeed those who are bullies who lord it over others less educated, or poorer, or less advantaged. Many of those people however have psychological and personality issues have nothing whatsoever to do with wisdom. They give all others who are wise and would be helpful to us a bad name. 

Don't become sucked into that distraction. Too many of those bullies want you to hate all those smarter than you, merely so you will listen only to them. They can be hard to spot. But many times easy to see as those who claim they are the ONLY solution. ONLY they can save you. These are confidence hucksters, con men and women and do not trust them! Even though we have no elected on as President of the United States of America. But that too will pass. 

Still, that is no excuse for what we are seeing in America today.

Yet, there we are. Here...today.

In America.

The future is ours. It is yours. Make of it what you will

Just remember, you are not alone. What you do affects us all.

For better or for worse. 

Monday, April 6, 2020

The Exception That Proves The Rule

First up, I'm on a podcast about the making of my new film, "Gumdrop", a short horror. Now...

"Exceptio probat regulam in casibus non exceptis." That is: The Exception That Proves The Rule.

I've seen this misused so many times, it's embarrassing. Typically I hear it used to rationalize and justify a thing that is patently incorrect.

SOMETIMES it is used to show that something nearly always one thing can actually be another, typically the opposite, under present constraints or conditions. That is to say, they agree with you that what they are saying is usually wrong, but in this case, as they see it, with how things are, they are correct in their assumptions about it.

How that typically is used however is as a logical fallacy to justify their foolish contentions, because so many get lost in the phrasing.

Or as rational wiki puts it:
"You are most likely to encounter this phrase when somebody is speaking in generalisations or stereotypes and somebody else points out an example that clearly contradicts their comments. Retorting with the platitude that this is just the "exception that proves the rule" is an easy way of handwaving away this inconsistency."

But that all require a sense of understanding where one has a greater sense of reality and extenuating issues we seldom see when applied today, especially as regards politics.

Trump is the exception that proves the rule, that all conservatives are stupid."

I'm not even going to bother disassembling that one. But we do see this frequently among those not as educated or aware as they wish to project they are. Frequently we see this in conservative's arguments in support of ridiculous doctrines, policies, or politicians (see above).

"The exception that proves the rule."

As the grammarist.com puts it:
"A proverb often quoted, but many find confusing. A proverb is a short, common saying or phrase that particularly gives advice or shares a universal truth. We will examine the true meaning of the phrase the exception that proves the rule, its ancient origin, and some examples of its use in sentences.

"...often used to justify something that seems to contradict a rule. However, the term the exception that proves the rule actually means this exception, under these parameters, proves that the rule works in all other circumstances. In this case, the word proves is used in a semi-scientific sense to mean test."

For instance,

If a sign at a bakery states “Doughnuts available Sunday morning”, this is the exception that proves the rule that doughnuts are not available at the bakery at any other time.

This is not how most people seem to use it.

The term, "the exception that proves the rule", is derived from a Latin phrase first used by Cicero, "exceptio probat regulam in casibus non exceptis", which means the exception confirms the rule in cases not excepted.


This is typically beyond the mentality of most who attempt to use this phrase.

Is THAT the exception that proves the rule?

Monday, March 30, 2020

We Need to be Smarter in America

First of, let me say I hope everyone is doing well during this global pandemic. Leadership in something like this, something somewhat unprecedented for this generation, is always going to be difficult.

Some do better than others, some countires having a tough time of it than others. But being smart about it, learning, going to your best minds and information, will ALWAYS win out over the opposite end of the spectrum.

All the best to all of you and everyone, everywhere! Moving on...

First up, this just in...today, after this blog went live, I did a Kelly Hughes podcast. Now also on Apple. It ended up being about the production of my new film, "Gumdrop", a short horror. He has others that are all actually pretty interesting. He has two, a podcast on cult figures and indie filmmaking. Our last podcast together was a fun with about one of our favorite actors, Steve Buscemi.

So, if you're looking for something different and especially if you're into indie filmmaking...well, there you go!

Also, if you're into ebooks, all my ebooks on Smashwords are free for the next couple of weeks in their sale, asked for by the authors because of the coronavirus situation. Many good authors on there besides myself are offering their books at a discount, or free.

Moving along now...

I graduated from Western Washington University in 1984 with my second degree, one in Psychology in the Awareness and Reasoning Division of that department. Realizing I could have gotten yet another degree, I went instead with just getting a minor in creative writing. That ended up going into fiction writing, screenplays and team scriptwriting (an amazing series of classes I was chosen for along with seven incredible other theatre department students, from our Playwriting 101 class).

Western Washington University, Bellingham, WA
I learned there that what I had been doing all my life and in college was pursuing life as an "intellectual". ALL that really means is that my focus in life was to exercise my mind in the most effective and efficient ways possible and seeking the best available information, updating it always.

Please bear with me, because this is not going to end up where you may think it is, from where it is starting. I'm trying to lay down a very important point. And you may find something useful unrelated to the primary reason for this blog today.

Once I found the label for what I was, I owned it. I was proud of it. And rightly so. As anyone like that should. Do you see football players going around hiding their chosen orientation or professional in life? No. Typically they are praised for it. Not always the same for those in the Arts or intellectual fields.

I've come to learn there isn't a lot of awareness and reasoning in America. Our current president Donald Trump is a case in point. But this is not a new thing. I was surprised while at my university, to discover just how much that was true in those outside of higher education. Also, just how many viewed an educated mind with suspicion. I was at times, stunned by it.

I knew that was true of my family as my parents, who weren't highly educated. I was the first to get a college degree. My mother had a sharp mind, but it was unfocused and to be sure she had some emotional issues.

Although a few after I graduated had great respect for someone with a higher education, I was very surprised at how many people (or any, as I saw it) outside that protected life at university, looked down on those who had a higher education and could think to an exceptional degree and depth.

And I literally have a degree in that.

After decades of considering all that, I began to say that "Ignorance, is noble."

We are all ignorant of something. Stupidity however has no nobility in itt. "Selective ignorance", as I understand stupidity, is not noble and should be seen as anathema. That seems to be a central tenet however of some political parties. Of the conservative GOP for one, or at least some of their more easily swayed, and apparently ignorant, believers. I tend to lean as many do, to a more enlightened party. Inclusive. Aware of exigencies in life, repercussions, and the future. These things do not seem to be of great consideration with Republicans. Here, now, profit does.

If you take offense to that, I suppose you may be one. That's fine. We're all people. Here, we're all Americans and that earns you something. By birth, or choice. I don't have anything against Republicans anymore than I'm not really a Democrat. I'm for the best idea, the best action, being better. I just don't see that much with Republicans. They can't seem to see the forest for the trees too often.

Look. I'm not offended by being called, ignorant. IF I am actually ignorant about something. I would then review to find if either they are the ignorant one and merely lashing out at me, ignorantly and immaturely (which I see a lot of anymore). Or I have to change my condition, my orientation, my view on whatever the topic at hand, is.

I don't have a problem when I met someone smarter than me, more educated. I actually find it kind of an honor to be allowed around them. Unless they are jerks about it, or just jerks period. Either way, I gleam from them whatever I can. And if they are decent people I offer them whatever I have to offer. I try to understand or learn the way they think. Is it better than mine? Cool! Awesome! Do they know things I don't? Even better.

Sometimes they already know most of what I know. Or they are so much smarter than me I can't really learn that much from them. It's another level beyond me. And that is also awesome. Because I met that person. Any action you have like that, betters you. But it's you doing the bettering.

I have some sayings I like. Even a village idiot has his story. Meaning you can learn from anyone. You can learn sitting in front of a blank wall. You can learn talking to your self. Try carrying on a debate or conversation with your self. Play both parts. I first tried that in junior high and was shocked to learn, I learned something.

Life is amazing, if you let it be. Be positive. Try to be around people better than you think you are. Don't let it increase your lack of self-esteem. Allow it to build it to reasonable and accurate levels. We have resources surrounding us daily. Most people don't' see or use most of them.

Can I think like a genius? Maybe not but then, good for them and I wish I could do what they can do. I sure as hell don't hold it against them, or feel bad because of them. It's a gift to meet a Van Gogh, an Einstein, an Aristotle, a Michio Kaku. But you don't have to meet a genius to be impressed or feel you've elevated yourself. It could be anyone, even people you know now.

I have repeatedly felt awed by my children, even when they were four years old. I learned from them. All it takes to self educate yourself is to start doing it. Pay attention, think of the connections, the relative issues and things involved with whatever you are thinking about. Stretch yourself. Expand your mind.

That's what that means. It's what being "Enlightened" is. When you eat an apple, you "see" the seeds inside, the store or tree you got it from. The box it was transported to the store in or perhaps the tree it came off half way around the planet.The people who picked it, the ground it grew in, the sun above it, that is the same sun now above you. And so on.

You don't have to see everything, you just have to try to. And when you hit a wall, find the next connection, the next associated route or pathway or thing, Strive, enhance, build, rebuild, add, synthesize, repeat. Alter. Combine. Invent.

When you are around a muscle builder, or a professional athlete, you may be able to learn knowledge from them, but you cannot gain their body and form through osmosis. The wondering things about thinking, how one things, methods or even tricks to increase brain horsepower...ANYONE can gain that through osmosis. That's how learning works. ,

Yet oddly enough, many people take a negative orientation to smarter people, the more educated.My grandmother had a lot to do with how I am today. She was self educated. Read the dictionary. Always said to try to be around people smarter than you, professionals.And I have, and I've been around a lot of them.

I would learn to end my ignorance. It's NOT that hard to do. Though apparently it is for some, for too many. For too many today, in this era of instant communication and a vast wealth of knowledge at our fingertips. It's a truly curious phenomenon. Apparently, on a daily basis we survey much, but only to a shallow degree.

I've discussed all this before. I used to say and to be proud of it, that I was an intellectual. I still ama and always will be, it's merely a definition I fit. Just as I am caucasian. Something I used to adamantly disagree with. "White"? Sure. Caucasian? No. My father was Irish, as were his parents, my grandparents, and so I am. I lean more to the Irish side of my heritage going back to my first months in high school

My mother was Czechoslovakian, as were her parents, and so I am. But :"Caucasian: means, from the Caucus Mountains, which are in eastern Europe. So one day I looked it up and to my surprise, yes indeed, I am Caucasian. The map dictated my reality. So I changed my long time orientation.And that is what an intellectual would do. So if you've done such a thing, you too many be an intellectual. However you have to live in that way, make that you life. Update.

What I see in the world around me today are people who retain their beliefs over and against realty. They would see the map and say, "I don't care, I'm not Caucasian!" They would rationalize around it so they could believe whatever it is they wish to believe.

That seems apparent and rampant in the Republican party of Donald Trump today. Trump isn't presidential material and they believe he is. Many were climate change deniers, then climate change by human means deniers. See how that progresses and rationalized as they find necessary?

Friends finally warned me years ago to stop saying I was an "intellectual". I rally was surprised by it. I was proud of it. I had worked really, really hard in college at it. I had earned the title, not even considering I had simply led me life like that since childhood. How would you like to be a football player with all the bangs and bruises and workouts and games only to be told you are being looked down on for it. It's a shock to the system. Violence is rewarded. Intellectuality, like sexuality in many cases, is not.

It's why historically we have seen so much violence in films but not sex to the same degree. And why there are more war films than films about intellectuals and artists.

That the basis of my entire life was taken wrong...I was shocked, frankly. I thought everyone should be an intellectual, at least to some degree. Doesn't that just make sense? But that was not the case and some are proud of being just the opposite.

So I stopped using that world. I saw it as merely saying, I'm into sports, or into movies and so I was cinephile. What's the big deal? Yet, some, too many, were offended by it? Weird. Right?

Look at it as a bodybuilder who exercises their body with all the same oriented at their physical form and health. It's no different, only for the mind. I wasn't elitist about it, I wasn't being superior, or lording over others with it. It was just my orientation and seemed to be the best way for me to exist.

But then, people do look down on bodybuilders, I guess and some on sports types, there there are a lot of sports types in this country. Following sports teams. Betting on games. Fantasy Football leagues. But I came to realize that in just exercising one's mind among others, they took it as lording over them. In sharing knowledge, it was seen as being superior, even when going to great lengths to avoid that.

I was very proud of what I had learned. NOT that I WAS learned. But that I had had, had taken, the opportunity to learn and achieve the level I had. And it took me four years in the USAF to get college paid for so I could get a four year degree in eight years, essentially. It was hard, and long work. To be sure the military work was physically demanding for me in my career field. I earned my position in life! As much as or more so than many.

I had believed it was a human being's highest goal, to be as smart and educated as possible. So pushing the limits with the most accurate, cutting edge info/knowledge made even more sense. Right? To achieve, Wisdom. Intellect combined with experience and knowledge. I worked hard at that, and for that.

Late nights at the library, studying not partying, talking to my professors after classes. Even getting to know them outside of school. Finally being told by my department advisor, my main professor that I was in the top 10% of the top 10% of all psychology students nationwide.

Something to be proud of, right/ Although, I found I had to hide that, keep it to myself. I honestly cannot remember if he said 2% or 10%. It feels like he said 2 but it seems like he might have said 10. So, best to err on the side of discretion and not eqo. Now, consider by comparison, if I were Donald Trump. Then I would have said the top 1%.. Or more accurately, "the number one student!" And then gone on more about it.

Then after I gradated, it did me little good in finding a job. Though eventually it paid off rather well.

After receiving my university degree, I discovered in public there was a trend against education. Maybe it had always been there, but I was now acutely aware of it. I heard terms, I now realize from conservatives, people I was not aware of yet back then, who "joked" about things that don't exist. Like how college graduates are "college stupid". An obvious contradiction in terms and oxymoron.

Here now, today,decades later, we hear things spoken aloud, like, "Fake News". A natural extension of all that animosity toward knowledge. And ever more so, those who actually buy wholeheartedly into it, and believe it, with a degree of glee, some of them.

They now have a US president in Donald Trump, a failed TV reality star and businessman, a self proclaimed "King of debt" (a warning sign for one who wishes to be POTUS, President of the United States), who perpetuates that mindset. A man who relies on it, who avoids responsibilities and honesty through it, in order to free himself up to achieve even further power, while diluting our democracy all for the purposes of more wealth and autonomy to fo even further. This does not bode well for the future of the presidency in America.

There is even an entire news network in Fox News who are dedicated to it. Russia has also pushed it. They developed the covert paradigm of REAL fake news as disinformation. Using their word for it, dezinformatsiya. Which took the UK to teach American intelligence agencies about during WWII. We're new to it. But eventually it seeped into our right wing political party and they have now made it mainstream. Much to our, all of our, detriment.

Donald Trump supports it. As does the conservative right-wing. Their, "MSM", Fox News, their mainstream media, their Trump State TV, also supports it. Fox News has become the American version of Russian Pravda newspaper, or Sputnik or RT (Russian TV), all State branches of the Russian government, the Kremlin, all run remotely by Vladimir Putin.

In dealing with Russia over the years, their criminality has seeped into America. The Soviet Union was massively corrupt. Russia today is also. They have fake democracy. Putin is situating himself as President for life now. The Russian government, their intelligence services, the Russian mafia and crime syndicates, are all dynamically joined. But America remains ignorant of it all. Even while our intelligence agencies try to warn us. And our POTUS denies it, trusts Putin over our own intelligence people.

There is really no way to avoid it. Trump has had massive dealings with Russian in business, in enriching himself.

But his supporters are incapable of seeing it. The harden themselves against believing it.

It's amazing really. Truly amazing.

We have a subculture who have bought into this old Chinese belief during their "Cultural Revolution" that had set THEM back 50 years. They murdered their intellectuals, their scientists, their doctors.

The Chinese Comrades looked down on their educated because most of them were not. And because it served the purpose of their new Communist Party. When all it really serviced was those in power. The ignorant are far easier to manipulate. To control. To abuse.

And here we are today, in America. We elevate not the old, not the wise, but the young. We elevate not the intellectual but in many cases the very dumbest among us. Those who know how to pander, to divide, to separate and weaken for their own strength.

And so we see...Donald Trump as POTUS. Finally now, during a global pandemic everyone is beginning to see his weakness, his ignorance and how he has gathered his power. Trump's lies now, kill. And it is becoming quite clear to all.

To be sure, we need to be "America Strong".But strong should no longer also mean dumb. Or uneducated. Selectively ignorant. Stupid.

We now need no longer to be, "America the Stupid".

Because in the end? All our lives depend upon it.