Saturday, April 2, 2011

Weekend Wise Words

Be Smart. Be Brilliant.

“A word to the wise isn’t necessary, it is the stupid ones who need all the advice.”
—Bill Cosby

“Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: we both were crazy about girls.”
—Groucho Marx

“Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen or oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.”
—Dave Berry

“I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.”
—Groucho Marx

“Some see the glass as half-empty, some see the glass as half-full. I see the glass as too big.”
—George Carlin

“Men are like steel. When they lose their temper, they lose their worth.”
—Chuck Norris

“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then give up. There’s no use in being a damn fool about it.”
—W.C. Fields

“The man who can’t dance thinks the band is no good.”
—Polish Proverb

“When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun.’”

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