Monday, June 10, 2013
Is your life happening by accident?
Perhaps I should be asking, ISN'T your life happening by accident? Let's just for a moment, consider things that are easily left by the wayside.
Have you ever on a daily basis, considered your finances, your daily living expenses? How about your bills? Your retirement savings?
Of course you have. We have all had to. Maybe not so much the retirement part, especially if you are still young. But one has to take care of these expenses or one is not long to live this relatively easy life we have during these very modern times, even in this great country of ours called, "America". And yes, these times are relatively easy. Take the person with the most difficult life here and put them back 3,000 years ago and see how well they fare.
But how much do you attend to so called, "luxury" expenses? Such things as entertainment, refreshments including both food and drink beyond mere subsistence? What about your emotional or spiritual concerns? What about your happiness scale of how much life is worth living? Not paying attention goes both ways. You can not budget for them and not have them, or not budget for them and have them and lose control over them. Both can be bad in entirely different directions.
We tend to lend our concerns to the most immediate elements in our lives and forego the ones that are in many ways just as important, but seldom giving much thought to those "luxuries" because they are not of such immediate concern. But these are not forgone conclusions for they too are important to living the Human Experience. We hear much through life about the “spiritual” or religious side of things. But we do not hear so much about the other side of that equation. And there is another side to it.
Sadly for some, those foregone conclusions could be considered one's family, it could be they are only concerned for their own creature comforts and that is what guides their every living moment. When really they should be more concerned about their family, their obligations, their work or profession, or simply maintaining the dwelling they live in.
For most of us however, it would be in consideration of our family. But what about ourselves and own personal comforts. Look, it could be just giving enough consideration to the family dog or pet. Having or playing with your pet has been shown to greatly increase the quality and even duration of people. You just have to stop and ask yourself form time to time, "what is it I am forgetting in my life?"
For many of us and I think for our betterment, the answer is, "Me". We all have to consider ways to make life livable for ourselves, as well as those in our lives. But not just about those in our lives It is really about balance, though.
There is something about life in these times that puts us in the mindset that everything is going too fast around us, taking up too much of our time and so makes for a good excuse for avoiding those things we find most difficult (or boring) to deal with. That is to work out how to have enough of everything in life that we need as Human Beings.
There are indeed a great many demands put upon us in our daily lives. But if you go back in time and read what our predecessors had to say about the life they were living, it was really much the same for them, too.
I have read deciphered hieroglyphics from ancient Rome and found that it was just the same for them. For instance, they had the same complaints parents have always had for their children: "they just don't listen", ”they are too self-absorbed", "they have no manners", and "they are only concerned about the here and now". Politics, civil and social situations were also much in the same with the same concerns and problems.
Times are always faster paced than when we were younger. It’s the nature of the beast of making your way through life from beginning to the end. Not to mention we simply tend to slow down through life. And that's OK!
And so it goes...on and on.
I think the key here is in the balance. One has to consciously weigh out the various elements of one's life. Consciously. Remember to take the time for yourself, just as you do for every one and every thing else that you feel responsible for. Remember that you too are important. Just be sure to understand that you are not all that is important. Weigh out if you are overbalancing your concerns toward yourself, or others.
Do you sacrifice too much for others? Because that can lead to a rebound effect if you're not careful and in the end, time and pressure included, it can break you. Take time to release those pressure, to enjoy some of what life has to offer you. You don't need a fancy four star vacation, sometimes it can just be about enjoying a moment during the day. Appreciate that sunset, that beautiful tree, an exchange of pleasantries between two people on the street. You work hard, maybe you can't play hard, but play-- some.
Getting through the difficulties of life is not about that once a year two week vacation (if you even get one, I haven't had one of those myself, since the 1990s. It's really more about having a special moment, multiple special moments, each day. Special moments every so many moments throughout every day of your life.
Simply put, one needs to plan to enjoy the trip, the journey, not just the destination. Besides, sometimes the destination turns out to be just not what it was cracked up to be. But if you've enjoyed the trip to get there, what does that matter? Some no doubt, but then you haven't put the entire weight of the thing on that one part.
Also, take care for your future self. Do today what will do well for you tomorrow; just as in the past where you have hopefully done then, for yourself today.
It never really ends, until it ends. So help it along. Life is one big continuing ending. Some say that the moment we are born we begin to die. Disconcerting perhaps, but work with what you've got. Help that ending along as much as you can.
On the other hand, if you are too absorbed with only your fun times now, reflect on what got you to where you are now. If you now have the leisure time and the influence, power, money, resources (or none of those and so you are free to do as you will to be able) to do anything you like, do not forget the other side of the coin. If nothing else, it makes you appreciate more the good times you are now having now.
Life is good. But Life is also a piece of artwork, much like a painting. Or a relationship. You have to ask yourself, “is my life framed like a Jackson Pollock painting, with parts of life flung hither and yon with apparent (though possibly not) total abandon?” “Or am I more like a Rembrandt painting, with a perfection of each brush stroke and palette given much thought, with great attention to detail and a concern for every breath and sigh?”
Well, it’s up to you.
Life is good. Or it can be.
But a good life doesn't just happen by accident.
Writer, screenwriter, psychologist, theoretician, philosopher.
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