Wishing you ALL a safe and meaningful July 4th—Independence Day, when we honor actual freedom, fireworks (apparently), and the founding ideals of our democratic republic (now greatly rejected by the Right, for some reason).
But in today’s frenzied media landscape, those ideals are increasingly drowned out by chaos, disinformation, and polarization.
Even more disturbing are the ongoing authoritarian efforts by Donald Trump and his enablers to dismantle the very democracy we celebrate—while his supporters, lost in their preferred delusion over actual democracy, pretend it isn’t happening at all.
Congressman Adam Smith of Washington state (my home state) has stated that China, Russia, and North Korea are now actively cooperating in efforts to undermine the United States. Criminals and autocrats are uniting, having invaded our government with enough acknowledgement and agreement their leader was re-elected POTUS47, even as a convicted felon. A literal convict.
Sometimes absurdity is our only recourse to maintain and continue...it's why Purpleism was created to support humanity and reject everything that irritated the human body politic and mentality..
Donald Trump’s "presidency"—both as the 45th and 47th President—offered America and the world a masterclass in dysfunction, corruption, and democratic decay. That, is a Kakistocracy. POTUS45 was a warning. POTUS47 has been the confirmation.
But let’s say, hypothetically, someone wanted to outdo Trump in the Worst US President Olympics. Or something.
Could it be done? Oh, absolutely.
1. Install a Literal Dictator
Trump flirted heavily with authoritarianism—admiring strongmen, firing watchdogs, and undermining elections. But if you really want to one-up him, don’t stop at flirting. Go full marriage. Eliminate elections altogether and appoint yourself Supreme Leader for life. Bonus points if your inauguration includes a military flyover and a golden throne.
2. Replace the Constitution with Tweets
Trump governed by rage-tweet; now just formalize it. Scrap the Constitution and make Truth Social the new Federal Register. Legislation by meme. Policy by algorithm. Imagine executive orders written in all caps and misspelled hashtags.
3. Make Conspiracy a Cabinet Post
Why stop at appointing cronies and loyalists? Doing worse means putting QAnon at the head of Homeland Security. Let Alex Jones run Health and Human Services. Maybe give David Icke a shot at the State Department. Reality is optional, and paranoia is patriotic.
4. Criminalize Facts
Trump attacked the media and labeled facts as fake. But doing worse means outlawing fact-checking altogether. Ban science. Make critical thinking a felony. Launch a Ministry of Alternative Truths. Bonus: mandatory brainwashing on Mondays.
5. Go Full Idiocracy
Trump gave us bleach cures and Sharpie hurricanes. But you can take it further. Nationalize Monster Energy. Replace the Surgeon General with a YouTuber. Outlaw books, reinstate leeches. Let’s run the country like a subreddit gone feral.
6. Pardon Yourself Into Oblivion
Trump toyed with the idea of pardoning himself. Doing worse means issuing daily, preemptive pardons to yourself and your cronies. Bribery Tuesdays. Embezzlement Fridays. The DOJ becomes a suggestion box.
7. Declare War on Geography
Trump mispronounced Yosemite and invented "Nambia." So, doing worse means declaring war on imaginary countries. Maybe launch airstrikes on Atlantis. Sanction Middle Earth. Turn the Pentagon into a Dungeons & Dragons campaign.
Final Thoughts
Trump showed us how bad it can get. POTUS47 is showing us what happens when we don’t learn from history. But doing worse? That takes commitment, a complete divorce from reality, and a pathological hatred for facts, governance, and basic human decency.
Let’s not find out how bad it can get.
Satire aside, it’s time we stopped entertaining chaos and started choosing competence. Democracy isn’t self-sustaining—it needs defenders, not destroyers
Compiled with aid of ChatGPT
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